How to hit reset

When your kid really needs it

Hello everyone! Happy Holidays from us to you. We hope you’re enjoying the post-Santa slowdown and taking some time to yourself—we all know you deserve it! We’re big fans of this cranberry cider margarita recipe. Just in case you need ideas for “taking some time to yourself.”

Today, let’s have a quick chat about an important “how to” for parents of teens and tweens: how to reset a relationship. Bookmark this one for the next time your teen’s door slamming makes you want to slam your own door.

It will happen to you if it hasn’t already. You’ll face a difficult moment with your teen or tween when you think to yourself, “wow…wish I could just give this relationship a hard reset.”

The bad news? It will probably happen on more than one occasion.

The good news? You can hit reset and get back on track, even after it feels like things have flown off the rails.

Because even though it will 100% be filled with ups and downs, your emotional relationship with your kids matters so much. Did you know: 

  • Strong parental relationships are linked to higher levels of self-control and self-esteem in teenagers. 

  • According to research, adolescents generally like and admire their parents…and want to spend time with them (even if it doesn’t always feel that way).

So when you inevitably hit a bump in the road, get into a blowup fight, start to feel disconnected from your teen and their life, or simply don’t know how to talk to the changing young person who lives in your house…here are some resources to reset your relationship.

We’ve got some incredible expert interviews for our Common Parent members:

And if you’re not a member yet, give yourself the holiday gift of signing up to become a member of a community built for parents just like you who have questions and want answers about navigating the chaos of modern parenting. Go here to join the Common Parent!

Here are 10 ways to rebuild your relationship with your teen. A lot of this great advice reminded us that it’s not so complicated…we’re often the ones overthinking things.

This piece from the New York Times was full of expert advice for understanding the way your teen’s brain works…and convincing them to put away their gosh darn phones already!

This one had some great pointers for disagreeing with your teen in a constructive way that teaches them how “fights” should look in the future. Love the chance to set a boundary while also modeling strong communication with your kid!

Bottom line: Even into their teen years, our kids are sponges. They see how we face conflict and move on from it, and doing that well can give us the chance to arm our kids with stellar communication skills, emotional intelligence, and an appreciation for honesty with our loved ones. 

Let’s not be the parents who never said “sorry” after a disagreement with their kids. Let’s do better—even if it requires a tougher conversation.

Thank you so much for reading today’s newsletter! We’re spending the rest of this week as horizontal as possible, eating leftovers and watching Hallmark movies. Hope you get a chance to do the same! 

Thanks for the best 2023. We can’t wait for all the amazing stuff to come in 2024! See you in the new year. ♥️

—Cat & Nat