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Are you the default parent?

Plus: new social media laws

We were lied to. Someone told us that having teen boys would be easier? But after spending an hour every morning getting our boys’ “flow” right with a Dyson AirWrap, hearing all about how YSL cologne is better than Axe body spray, and watching our sons work tirelessly to keep their sneakers looking like they’ve never been worn…we’re starting to wonder. Is having teen boys just as crazy as having teen girls?

Shout out to the parents of teen boys. You’re doing all that and feeding a bottomless pit 3–5 meals a day. You’re a superhero.

Unpacking Florida’s New Teen Social Media Law

Should kids be restricted—or banned altogether—from social media? Some lawmakers in Florida think so. The state’s Senate just passed a bill that would…

  • Prevent kids under 16 from creating accounts on at least some social media platforms

  • Require platforms to close out existing accounts that they know or have “reason to believe” are owned by minors younger than 16

  • Allow parents to request that minors’ social accounts be terminated

Supporters say: This is about addictive features on social media platforms, not limiting free speech. The goal is to protect kids from the harmful mental health side effects of social media.

Critics say: Whether kids are on social media should be a decision that involves parents, not just lawmakers.

We’re curious what you think: Should lawmakers be able to make rules about kids on social media, or should this be on parents?

Click one to tell us what's up.

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What Your Kids Are Actually Into

What are the kids into these days? Most of the time, it feels impossible to know. All we’re really sure of is that our kids think we’re lame—they all agree on that.

But if you want to know more about what Gen Alpha is really into these days, this hilarious mom named Faith Hitchon has you covered on TikTok. Her latest findings, informed by her middle schooler daughter?

  • Starface pimple patches are a form of currency. Not just skincare, but an accessory with inherent value.

  • The boys are all growing “chad cuts,” or those floppy 2000s era haircuts.

  • Hoodies > cardigans and loose jeans > anything tight (and definitely no skinny jeans).

What are your kids making fun of you for these days? Hit reply and tell us so we can all laugh together.

Who’s the Default Parent?

Have you talked to your partner about the “default parent” phenomenon? The default parent is the one whom kids automatically turn to when they’re sick, when they can’t sleep, when they forgot to get a poster board for a project due tomorrow, etc. In two-parent households, the default parent often carries a heavier burden in caring for children, child-related responsibilities, and home-related tasks.

And it’s probably not a surprise to the moms reading this, but women and mothers are disproportionately impacted by this default parent phenomenon. But could that be changing?

  • As more women enter the workforce (read: the share of stay-at-home-moms shrinks), the percentage of stay-at-home parents who are fathers has risen almost 64% over the last 30 years, according to Pew Research Center.

  • Almost 1 in 5 American parents who do not work for pay are fathers these days.

Want to talk to your partner about default parenting? Here are some good tips for breaking out of the default parenting pattern…without the mom guilt.

Hear us out: There might still be snow on the ground, but now is the time to start thinking about summer plans for your kids. We just talked about this on our Unfiltered podcast…if our kids stay home all summer sitting on their phones? It’ll be bad news for everyone involved.

We don't have a cottage, an endless amount of money for vacations, or the resources to let our kids shop all day. That means they need 1) camp 2) a job or 3) all of the above. So today, the perfect recs to set some boundaries and plan a summer that’ll actually be a good influence on your teens and tweens.

Real talk: We feel a lot of mom guilt a lot of the time. Especially when we work from home while our kids are in the house—do they know work is important but they’re more important? Mom (and dad) guilt is so real, and based on what all of y’all have told us…it’s pretty universal.

So here’s your reminder to turn off that parenting guilt for just a minute today. No one is perfect. That’s okay! You’re doing your best, and your children will recognize that. ❤️

—Cat & Nat